It’s no secret that one of the keys to living an aligned, happy, healthy and joyful life is having meaningful and authentic connection. That’s why I made “Connect” one of the four pillars of the Taller, Slimmer, Younger Transformation Program – because when you have true connection in your life and a tribe to honor and support you, that’s when true transformation can happen.

Even though there are many different types of relationships and love that you’ll experience in your life, one of the most powerful is romantic love. Most of us desire a partner who we can share our lives with, and oftentimes romantic relationships are some of the most fulfilling relationships we’ll experience.  So let’s take a look at what it takes to find true romance!

The first step is to love yourself unconditionally

One of the most important parts of finding and cultivating love in your life is to first learn to love yourself. This means beginning to cultivate a sense of awareness and accountability for your feelings. Once you become aware of what makes you feel good and aligned, versus closed off or resentful, you learn to say no to things that don’t feel good and to ask for what you really want.

The more you can do this and look after your own heart, the more you can open yourself to give and receive love and give to others in a more wholehearted way.

How to manifest your dream partner

In my book, The Power Source I talk about how you can almost ‘build your dream partner. Now that might sound a bit far-fetched but it’s really just like building your dream house – before you do that you have a plan, you draw it or map it out, you know what you want it to be like, what the foundation will be made of, and how you want your home to make you feel when you’re there. This is essentially the same process I want you to consider when you imagine your dream partner. 

I talk about doing this practice because I know just how powerful it can be – both my husband, Gus and I made a list similar to the one below, and shortly after we both made our lists we were introduced to each other by friends. Now we share a beautiful life and family together and we truly believe that is because we were so intentional we were with this practice.

Try this exercise to help you:

• Write down super-specific qualities of who you want to invite into your life and your heart
• Think about what you truly need to thrive in a relationship and to feel like your truest, most authentic self
• Try to ignore any thoughts that come from others about what you need, or what social media or TV/movies tell you
• Focus on personality traits you admire versus the physical qualities

When you do this exercise, don’t try to rush it. Give yourself some time and space to add things to the list that align and resonate with you. Once you have your list, you are planting the seed of what you want to manifest and attract into your life, which is a powerful thing. When you complete the list, put it away in a safe place, but not somewhere where you will see it frequently. Don’t cling to the list but surrender and know that you’ve set the intention and planted the seed.

You’ll be amazed at how powerful it is to set this intention. You’ll be more open to attracting love and intimacy into your life, and when it comes, you’ll know it’s aligned and right because you’ve already laid the foundation of who this person is and how you want to feel in the relationship. There is nothing quite like being in a relationship that is aligned in love, truth, connection and shared values.

Also, as you work on finding alignment in your physical body, it’s often the first step in aligning the rest of your life. If you are currently on a journey (like the TSY challenge) give yourself the time to honor and feel empowered in your body and love yourself for that. This is a powerful step in feeling connected to your strength, and your true passions and desires in life. You’ll notice that once you feel more aligned physically, the other areas in your life, including your relationships will often come into alignment as well.

When you invite love and connection into your life you approach situations from a place of understanding and peace. You will also feel heard and worthy. Life is a journey and this will ebb and flow naturally, however, taking care of your body by eating nourishing food, getting deeper sleep, moving to make you feel strong and connecting with your tribe are the tools you need.

Make sure you surround yourself with people who inspire and motivate you, be that co-workers, family, friends or your partner – the more love we get and feel worthy of the more we can cultivate.

So get out there and get lovin’!